This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
