he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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