Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
