Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
