So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize
