you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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