i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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