Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
