come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
