Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Your penis caused this!
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
