Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
