I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
