i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
