we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
