What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize