Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
we're so committed to being not committed
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
