Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize