Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize