you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
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