Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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