I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
The air was thick with penises
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
