I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
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