My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize