Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
