Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
