Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I think pants incapable of making pants work
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
