I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
