apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
