she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize