i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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