at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
