The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
