it wasn't lemon gatorade
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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