my mouth tastes like poor choices
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
