Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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