How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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