somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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