What a fucking waste of an outfit
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
It's no shave November. This is our time.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize
