So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
