too bad you live with your parents still
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
