I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize