just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
