Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize