Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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