They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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