I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
