We're like a lot better than the average bears
No stitches, just platelets and will power
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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