I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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