Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
honey bunches of taint.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize