you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
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he has the hands of the vagina gods.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
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You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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