This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
