her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
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