She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
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